Tuesday, November 6, 2012

Reviewing a Train Wreck - Classes and Races: Dinosaurs (for Pathfinder)

All THIS can be yours for a mere $2.99
It isn't often that I review a product that, going in, I know is going to be Attack of the Killer Tomatoes type of bad.

Meaning, it's so bad, it's actually fun to review. That's pretty bad.

So, let me get right to it. See the cover art up above? Thats as good as it gets. No, I'm not kidding although I wish I was.

Maybe you really don't believe me. If you look at your calendar, it's November 6th, not April 1st - trust me when I say to you - this is no joke.

Still, you need more evidence. Maybe there were survivors of this train wreck. Maybe there is something redeemable after all.

Lets move in for a closer look. Hey, look at the cute dino!
The Saurischian are a race descended from the predators of the past. They value tribal cooperation and the thrill of the hunt.
Physical Description: Slender and fast, the Saurischian vary from 90 to 150 pounds. They range in height from 4 to 6 feet. Their skin tends to have some sort of spot or stripe that tend to run in families.
Their tails are long and slender and not useful for holding things. (My God! There is so much useful description here!). This is followed by the Pathfinder Stat block info. Hey, they are familiar with Rapiers! (why that is, I have no idea)
Yep, that's all you get for the description of one of the two races, except for the pic. What, you want to see the pic? Don't say I didn't warn you...

Does he even have opposable thumbs to hold a Rapier? Does he wear clothes? A belt?
Also, I'm pretty sure you need more than the following when using the OGL, but I could be wrong (I suspect the author is wrong):


Open Game License v 1.0a Copyright 2000, Wizards of the Coast, Inc.
System Reference Document. Copyright 2000, Wizards of the Coast, Inc.; Authors Jonathan Tweet, Monte Cook, Skip Williams, based on material by E. Gary Gygax and Dave Arneson.
Pathfinder RPG Core Rulebook. Copyright 2009, Paizo Publishing, LLC; Author: Jason Bulmahn, based on material by Jonathan Tweet, Monte Cook, and Skip Williams.
The Book of Experimental Might. Copyright 2008, Monte J. Cook. All rights reserved.
Tome of Horrors. Copyright 2002, Necromancer Games, Inc.; Authors: Scott Greene, with Clark Peterson, Erica Balsley, Kevin Baase, Casey Christofferson, Lance Hawvermale, Travis Hawvermale, Patrick Lawinger, and Bill Webb; Based on original content from TSR.

Get it while you can, before it get's pulled.

Or rather, don't get it. For $2.99, it's the equivalent of burning 3 one dollar bills...

10 comments:

  1. I cannot fucking believe you pulled the trigger on this purchase. Must be all that overtime you're pulling right now.

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  2. Someone had to do it. For the children! :)

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  3. I actually like the art. I've seen worse. Of course, those were deliberately stylized to be ugly.

    And the thing with the OGL is that there are a lot of violations when it comes to Section 15, and I don't think any legal action was taken. FFE got into trouble, but they used stuff from D&D, not the SRD.

    Mongoose, for instance, borrowed the Noble Class from Fading Suns d20 as part of their "Power Class" line. They later re-used that class for their Conan RPG, but never mentioned Fading Suns d20 in the Section 15 for Conan, even though they didn't just use the ideas, but some of the actual text.

    One of the retro-clones (not the big ones) seems to borrow text straight from a D&D book as well. It re-writes it partially, but a few sentences are the same and would probably count as plagiarism.

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  4. @Jeremy - i'm just saying the requirement to quote the whole OGL isn't being followed. What i quoted is all the author quoted

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  5. Obviously they are proficient with Rapiers because they use that non-prehensile tail to provide balance when lunging with the rapier.

    What made you, someone who clearly knows nothing about Swordinoship, think you were qualified to review this product? It's these shoddy review that make people believe everyone is just out to make a fast buck, when it's widely known that everyone involved in RPG products is a noble, dedicated individual trying to bring joy to the enlightened bastard children of Arneson & Gygax.

    Harumph!!

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  6. If I was inclined to publish something, I would have no problem letting my kids illustrate it.

    Which is one of many, many reasons I don't have that inclination.

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  7. I really want a t shirt with that cover illustration on it and the words "DINOZAUR MAGIX!"

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  8. Made me laugh, which seems to be the point.

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  9. The creature on the left of the cover seems to be an alligator or a crocodile (i always forget how to tell the difference - something about a tooth),but it doesn't sound like they're mentioned in the text. i wonder if there's a planned 2nd edition to address that oversight.

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    1. Alligators teeth all fit in their mouths. Crocodiles lower teeth don't (but those in the drawing are uppers). The snout is broad on Crocs [which matches the drawing]. alligators are darker and shyer (goths?) than crocs.

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