What follows is
The Tenkar's Tavern Crowdsourced Wand of Wonder. I have edited some of the entries for consistency and occasional balance as well as to make them compatible with Swords & Wizardry Light's default dice (d6 and d20).
Random winners are as follows:
$10 RPGNow GC -
+Joseph Bloch
$5 RPGNow GC -
+Denis McCarthy
$5 RPGNow GC - Wolfgang Cole
$5 RPGNow GC - Steve Queen
For making me laugh
$5 RPGNow GC -
+Michael Gross
Winners should email me at tenkarsDOTtavern at that gmail thing to receive their GCs.
To roll on the
Tenkar's Tavern Crowdsourced Wand of Wonder Results Table,
Roll 1d20 and 1d6 and add the results.
2 - Every color on the user is reversed, including body, clothing, and possessions. Black becomes white, red becomes green, and so forth. The effect is permanent.
Joseph Block
3 - The Spirit of the wand 'time-stops' the user for 1d6 rounds, answering one question per round as truthfully as possible, but with a quirky, sometimes off-beat sense of humor, if more than 2 questions are asked, the caster suffers one round of being under a time stop himself. The wand answers only to 'Gary'...
James Stanton
4 - Target of wand has their clothing inverted inside out.
Denis McCarthy
5 - Fart gun. Shooting it means a normal attack roll, at +2, with 1d6 damage on a successful hit. Regardless of success, the target and anyone within 10 feet of the target must save vs. breath weapon or lose the next round while holding his nose. Range is 30 feet (thank goodness!).
Charles Saeger
6 - The rod turns into a non-magical torch for 1d6 hours.
Jayson Gardner
7 - Wand utters out loud a nearby enemy’s embarrassing secret. Ray Chapel
8 - Stream of coins. A steady stream of gold coins issues forth for one round, in a cone 15' long and 4' wide at the base. It will do 2d6 h.p. of damage to anything in the area of effect, and when complete, there will be 1d100+100 g.p. on the ground.
Joseph Bloch
9 - The wand extends 1d20' for a duration of 1d6 Rounds, thereafter losing all rigidity for a Turn before returning to its normal state. Anyone in the path of the wand's extension must Save vs having their eye poked (-2 to attacks for 1d6 turns).
Geordie Racer
10 - When activated the wand will produce a wondrous display of lights and sounds. The audience (those not expecting the use of the wand) must save vs spell or they will become completely enthralled with the display, stop all activity and watch the display. Each time physical damage is taken, a further save may be rolled to break the effect. The display will last 1 + D20 rounds or when the caster stops concentrating.
The difficulty of the save is increased by any CHA bonus and Bard levels of the user. A successful save breaks the effect and protects the character for the next 24 hours from the effect.
The range is a far as an audience member can see or hear the effect.
Wolfgang Cole
11 - On use, the wand created 5 cubic inches of mashed potatoes, topped with salt and gravy or butter to the wand user's specification. The wand does not create a bowl or other vessel to hold the conjured food, nor any utensils to eat it with.
John Kramer
12 - The Wand extends to 4 feet long and claps the wielder on the back as a show of support for doing such a good job.
John Kramer
13 - The wand calls upon the Fates to affect the wielder's attributes. Randomly determine an attribute, flip a coin, heads, add 1d3 to the attribute, tails, subtract 1d3 from the attribute.
John Kramer
14 - The wand summons 1d3 alternate universe versions of the weirder. These alternates are of different classes, genders, species and possibly even different genres as well. They spend 1d6 rounds arguing which of them is the truest or best form. After this time, 1 version disappears each round until only one remains, save vs. death to not be one of those that disappears.
Nathaniel Hull
15 - All magic rings in 1d10 yards of the wielder strike the wielder doing 1 hp damage each, before tumbling to the ground. This includes magic rings worn by the wielder and any party members. 1d4 rounds per ring are required to gather them up and put on a desired ring. Cursed rings will not leave the wearer, but instead drag the wearer towards the wielder, including all others or objects used to prevent this, if a strength check succeeds.
Follow Me And Die
16 - The immediate area will smell strongly of maple syrup. Anyone entering the area (defined as necessary by the DM) must save vs. pancake. Failure cause you to lose initiative will you figure out where you can score pancakes at this hour.
Justin Culverhouse
17 - Roll again; this effect occurs normally, but in the process of creating the effect the wand shifts polarity, magically (but not physically) reversing the front and back ends. The next use of the wand will treat the user as the target, and anyone/thing being pointed at by the wand as the user. This reversal lasts until the result is rolled again.
Alea Iactanda est
18 - With a sudden flourish of this wand, the air surrounding the wielder becomes filled with 6d20 floating dwarven skulls. These skulls erupt into a raucous falsetto rendition of ancient elven love-ballads. All within 60' of the event (including the wielder) must make a saving throw or stand transfixed and enthralled by the performance until its conclusion. This effect last 1d3+3 rounds.
Douglas Zielsdorf
19 - A swarm of brilliantly colored butterflies streams from the wand and flocks around a target. The butterflies can lift the target up to 20 feet up, and on a successful reaction roll, carry them at a rate of 10 feet per round, for 2d6 rounds. On a roll of 1-3 on a d6 they are not butterflies, but moths, and will destroy any cloth items the swarmed character is wearing instead.
Denis McCarthy
20 - All creatures within 1d4 x 10' of the wand must make a saving throw or have their heads rotated 180-degrees relative to their torsos for 1d6 rounds. Combat is difficult - every opponent is effectively invisible (-4 to hit) and attack rolls less than or equal to 4 (on a d20) indicate a self-inflicted wound. Unguided movement rate is reduced to 1/3 normal, anything faster requires a saving throw each round or 0-1 hp of damage is suffered from collisions.
Steve Queen
21 - A random near-by creature is sucked into the wand. They are unharmed, and in stasis. An additional activation (charge) of the wand is required to release them.
Steve Queen
22 - The minds of the two random (near-by) creatures swap bodies for the next hour. Confusion last for a 2 rounds - all skills/classes/memorized spells/etc. remain with the body - unless it would be funnier otherwise.
Steve Queen
23 - The flesh of all living creatures within 25' radius becomes magically adhesive - anything touched becomes affixed to it. If flesh touches flesh, the glued creature also immediately becomes adhesive as well. None of the creatures in the glue-chain can be separated (short of amputation/destruction) for 1 turn.
Steve Queen
24 - Three to eight (1d6+2) children from an alternate plane appear near the wand user. Roll a d20 on the table below for the children. Do *not* re-roll duplicates, use them! Children whose descriptions are noted with an asterisk (*) will eventually huddle around the wand user and ask to go back to the Romper Room. The wand looks much like the children’s teachers “attention stick” back home. (If the wand user or anyone else in the party says, “Romper Room,” the children are returned home. The speaker must make a saving throw or be whisked there, too!) Children will return to their plan on their own in 4d6 rounds.
1. Amy; she asks the wand user (or, if ignored other children) to tie her untied shoe*
2. Bryan; he is flexing his hands and walking in place saying, “I have to go.”*
3. Dylan; he tugs at the wand user’s clothes, saying, “I want to go on the monkey bars!”*
4. Gary; he is reading from a joke book and laughs periodically
5. Gus; he is holding an open plastic container of paste in his right hand and eating it with his left index finger*
6. Irene; she is tugging at the hem of her dress, crying for her mommy*
7. Jeffrey; he walks up to other children and squawks at them*
8. Katherine; she continually asks if she can “go on the playground slide”*
9. Keith; a conscientious child, he walks around to the other children and to the characters, asking, “Are you okay?”*
10. Kelly; she is reading from a book entitled, “Adventure Masters Guide”
11. Madison; she is holding an open bottle of bubbles and a bubble wand*
12. Marcus; he is quietly petting his purring cat, whom he brought in today for “Show and Tell”*
13. Michael; he holds a small hockey stick and exclaims, “Me Like Hockey!”*
14. Monique; an aspiring actress, she asks what her motivation is*
15. Nora; she is looking at a magazine
16. Paige; she is coloring on the floor*
17. Phillip; he wears a brown robe and is “working on his vows”*
18. Sydney; she is showing off her small containers that compose her bug collection*
19. Walter; he holds a beautiful flower and asks the other children to smell it*
20. Wendy; she is brushing her hair & asking, “Is it straight?” over and over*
Michael Gross
25 - The recipient of the wands pointing must make a save (d20) versus switching bodies temporarily with the user of the wand. Time to switch back bodies is 5 rounds + 2d6 (or something more reasonable) -
Unknown
26 - Re-roll twice and use both results.
OGL
Vaginas are Magic! - Vaginas are Magic! is a book of blasphemous, dangerous magic featuring spells that only women characters can cast. It also includes a new magic system for use with Lamentations of the Flame Princess and all other traditional class-and-level tabletop role-playing games.
