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Saturday, May 14, 2016

State of The Tavern - Sometimes the Simple Life Ain't so Simple - Update

So, the extended family stuff I alluded to earlier in the week? Mostly resolved, at least for now.

Short story - one of my mother's cousins, suffering from many of the potential mental effects of aging and refusing family help in dealing with those, walked to her local police station Monday evening and told the police her house had been "ransacked". When they drove her back home to investigate, she admitted she threw a hissy fit because her parents (in reality long since passed) were arguing and she was upset. Key the ambulance, hospital and medical determination that she was mentally incompetent.

Now no longer able to care for herself (or her cats) and with the family being informed she will never be returning to her home, we searched her house far and wide to find all the financial documentation the nursing home (where she was admitted yesterday) would need. And found a home for the two cats. And clothes for her. And personal items to make her room seem more like home. And dealt with the hospital, nursing home, social worker and the like. All while my mother, my sister and myself were accused by her of putting her there.

If she had only taken the help offered prior, she would have been in assisted living. Now, the nursing home will be her guardian.

Fun stuff.

Emails will go out to those gifting with the info of those being gifted this weekend. I seriously lacked the opportunity to do so this week.


  1. Wishing you and your family peace, especially your mother's cousin

  2. My heart goes out to you, Tenkar. I'm going through a similar situation. My mom had to be moved to a nursing home because of Alzheimer's. My dad just couldn't see that mom needed help. Mom passed away April 1st, and the nursing home was the best option. She was well looked after and it became her new home. Now I'm struggling with my dad who broke his hip January 1st and is in a retirement lodge receiving excellent care. But he is hellbent to go back home where his condition and opportunities would surely decline.
    The lesson for me has been to be ready to make these transitions myself when the time comes. Easier said than done, I know, but I don't want to put my daughters through what my wife and I have been through over these past few years.
    Best of luck!

  3. Same thing happened to my mother - hallucinating strangers in the house - calling the police. You all have my greatest sympathy.

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  5. Sorry, Erik. I am praying for you. If you need to vent or talk about it, this is the kind of thing I deal with every week in my day job.

    1. I appreciate the offer John.

      For now, I've chewed my wife's ear off. She's a social worker by trade. So now she gets my earful ;)